"Terkadang hal-hal sederhana seperti senyuman,sapaan 'halo' itu jauh lebih baik daripada "idealisme-idealisme rohani" yang orientasinya adalah diri sendiri,punya maksud-maksud tertentu,tanpa/minim kasih dan yang tidak pernah di aplikasikan sehingga orang lain bosan & muak mendengarnya"

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Christian Single - So, You're a Bridesmaid... Again

The longer you remain a Christian single, the more often you'll end up as a bridesmaid in your friends' weddings. You're probably familiar with this scenario: it's midnight on Friday night. You're just putting down your book and getting ready to turn off the lights and crawl into bed when the phone rings.

"Guess what?" your friend exclaims, "he proposed tonight! I'm getting married!" You feel mixed emotions at the news. Naturally you are excited for your friend, who finally broke out of the Christian single world and into married life, the life you have both been dreaming of together. But now you'll keep dreaming - with one less friend to share the misery with – and maybe one less friend all together; married friends are always too busy to remember you any more.

"And I want you to be a bridesmaid, of course!" she continues. Your mind begins to reel with a variety of thoughts and feelings. First there's the expense. Will she try to be economical when she chooses the dress? Will she make you buy matching shoes too? What about hair and nails? Your eyes turn to your closet as you contemplate the other four dresses hanging in the back – will she choose the color of the rainbow you are missing to make your bridesmaid dress collection complete?

Then there’s the old superstition about three times a bridesmaid... you figure after four times, you can't really do any more harm – can you? You can't help but think to yourself, "here we go again – another wedding that I'm in, but not as the bride..." When will it be your turn? Once you have been a bridesmaid so many times, it's hard not to feel a little bitterness towards the whole event.

As a veteran bridesmaid myself, I'm here to tell you there's hope at the end of the aisle. It's not easy to watch as your friends have their dreams fulfilled while you are still waiting, but in doing so, God is at work. He's preparing you for your own special future, and you have the choice to work with or against Him.

First, you are probably feeling both joy and jealousy for the bride. Remember that jealousy involves a lack of thankfulness for what God has given you and a lack of faith and hope in what He will be doing in the future. As a Christian single, God wants you to find contentment and joy in all circumstances, give thanks without ceasing, and have hope for your future. Your day will come – if not on earth, then in heaven at the Marriage Supper of the Lamb (Revelation 19:7-9). The words of Paul to the Thessalonians are perfect for the Christian single, "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you" (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Second, you know that at the end of the day when the bride rides off with the groom and it is time to go home to your empty apartment or hotel room, that you will be battling loneliness. Now that you don’t have the fun of the party to distract you, there is now plenty of time to allow your thoughts to drag you down into despair. It is this time that you must cling to the hope that God has a future for you too, "'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future'" (Jeremiah 29:11). Invite some other Christian single friends over after the wedding to distract you from loneliness and encourage you to hope in the Lord and what He is doing in your life.

There are perks for the Christian single "professional bridesmaid". When I got married, my wedding ran very smooth because I had witnessed so many other weddings and taken notes on what worked and what not to do. But the most important reason to be encouraged is because it means you have lots of friends who care about you and want you to be part of the most important day of their lives. So just keep on in your faith. My banner verse as a Christian single is one for you to take to heart on your friend’s wedding day, "Delight yourself also in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart". (Psalm 37:4).

by: Mara Miller